CHARACTERED PIECES Archives » Page 9 of 11

Blog Orgy Tour oh9-ohohoh10!

December 9, 2009

Tune up your virtual groupie van. I'm hitting the wwwD.O.T for a blog tour to promote Charactered Pieces: stories. Blog Orgy Tour oh9-ohohoh10 promises to be a beautiful bastardization of legitimate blog posts and self-serving salesy talk, the likes of which will leave you itchy and raw. What is a blog tour? It's a way for authors with no actual-tour budget to use the term "tour" when describing their marketing plans. Why a blog tour? The concept seems fun. I'm going to make stops at various personal and writing-related blogs, offering posts about Charactered Pieces, about me, and about writing in general, that will both promote my chapbook and honor the integrity of each blog I visit. These aren't gimmicky advertisements. They are cleverly disguised advertisements. Where are the tour stops? Great question, hypothetical reader. See the poster below, or visit the dedicated Blog Orgy Tour page for all the…

a new interview: Blank und Questions asks…ME!

November 24, 2009

The Blank und Questions series is now two-interviews strong; though, incestuous they may be [1.) I interview Gordon Highland, 2.) He interviews me]. I’m looking to spread the influence. I’ve got a few more lined up, and I hope to add many conversations to the series at next year’s AWP Conference in Denver, CO. Will you be there? Gordon, author of Major Inversions, was kind enough to sit down with me and wax the ol’ ego at my favorite Kansas City dive-bar, The Newsroom. This visit, I met a woman named Julie who brought in fresh catfish and was nice enough to share. Julie, if you are reading this, it was absolutely perfect. Gordon and I sat down in the back room of the bar, a cozy, couch & chair lined seclusitorium that is normally used for live music (one of which was setting up around us during the interview).…

Selling stinky books, set to music

November 22, 2009

As part of the Charactered Pieces: stories preorder, I promised to fill every copy with the delicious smell of ACID cigars, as part of the completely made up Lungs for Readers program. The experiment semi-failed, as most of the books instead acquired the nasty smell of burnt paper and stale smoke. Lesson learned. Though still, the books are special, containing, in addition to the 'dive-bar' flavor, VERY personal inscriptions, limited numbering, and random bits of trash I've been meaning to toss. You're welcome, readers. Take in the shenanigans above, set to the sweet sounds of Cecada and helped by my friends at ArtJerk.net. Thanks to everyone! You can buy Charactered Pieces: stories at Amazon.com or direct from the publisher.

The Colbert Report and Charactered Pieces

November 20, 2009

If any of you caught The Colbert Report last night, you definitely did not see an interview with me about my chapbook, Charactered Pieces: stories. I had been sweating the non-interview for weeks, well-aware of how Stephen Colbert treats his guests (victims?). Claiming fairness and balance, his questions instead aim to further weave his delusional and increasingly erratic conservative narrative. For this reason, I felt an appearance, though in my head entirely, would serve his ego well. I brought it, sir, if I do say so myself. Below is an unofficial Official Colbert Report Transcript from our interview. Stephen Colbert: Let me get right to it. Though I disagree with your incorrect political views, I commend you for this praise of consumerism that is Charactered Pieces. People love sex, and the first story, the title story, is all about selling sex. Plus, you’ve incorporated a strangely phallic deformity. It’s like…

Charactered Pieces officially on sale, embarassing pictures to be had

November 16, 2009

Today, Charactered Pieces officially goes on sale after an absolutely amazing pre-sale period. I can't thank enough the many people who have traded their hard-earned cash for these bound words of mine. Due to such generosity, I have decided not to use the money to purchase a new Lay-Z-Boy for the PETA compound. They will get a used chair instead. The remaining money goes toward R&D for more painful ways to stub toes. It's a cause that is close to my heart. Charactered Pieces is available to purchase in two formats: 1) a perfect bound print version: $7.00 US 2) a .pdf eBook version: $2 US Either of which can be purchased by visiting the Outsider Writers Collective purchase page. Now starts the real struggle: getting as many eyes as possible on those pages. I'm truly, honestly, non-fakingly proud of every word in this collection. For that reason, I want…

The book is fer’reals now…

November 12, 2009

Five (5) days left for free shipping, disturbing inscriptions, and stinky pages

November 11, 2009

Only five days left to preorder Charactered Pieces: stories and receive all of the following cash and prizes: Free shipping A (very) personal inscription. Note the specific name you would like the inscription made out to in the PayPal comments area. Also, note my use of the word “very;” I warn you: you may be disturbed by what I write. If you would rather a flat-signed, or “clean” copy, note that in the PayPal comments area as well. A picture of me signing the book (so there are no Antiques Roadshow conflicts 90 years from now) As part of the made up LUNGS FOR READERS program, each preorder will smell of delicious ACID cigars. Trust me, even if you don’t like cigars, you’d love the smell of ACIDs. Imagine if cinnamon and Italian food had a veal baby. My friends over at ArtJerk.net are going to help me stink up…