The first successful–and purposeful[1]“Purposeful” is used purposefully as I fear eunuchs, given that they’ve lost so much, would take offense to not being given at least some credit as early vasectomy adopters. Medically … Continue reading–vasectomy was done on a dog. There’s no documentation to support any of the possible theories as to why a dog was chosen, let alone the specific dog. It’s possible that a dog’s penis is simply similar to a human penis and therefore suffices as an anatomical stand-in. It’s possible that an ultra-capitalist breeder ordered the vasectomy to artificially curb supply for the particular breed. I prefer to imagine that the dog in question had aggressive genes and that its owner, not willing to have it euthanized, agreed to either of two alternate options: 1) dog condoms or 2) experimental wiener surgery. The wiener surgery was ultimately chosen I assume because at that time, the year 1823, condoms were “made of fish and animal intestine”[2]Notice the important grammatical choice here of leaving off “intestine” from fish, meaning that condoms were not made of fish intestines and animal intestines, but of whole fish. Think about that … Continue reading and nobody wanted to be the guy to wrap sheep guts around a dog boner.[3]Marvin the village creep volunteered, but nobody trusted their dog to be alone with him. (more…)
Footnotes
| ↑1 | “Purposeful” is used purposefully as I fear eunuchs, given that they’ve lost so much, would take offense to not being given at least some credit as early vasectomy adopters. Medically speaking castrated is not the same as vasectomized, but I’m not willing to make that point to someone who has already lost what many men consider their reason for living. Are you? |
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| ↑2 | Notice the important grammatical choice here of leaving off “intestine” from fish, meaning that condoms were not made of fish intestines and animal intestines, but of whole fish. Think about that next time you claim that a condom is uncomfortable. Source: http://www.vasectomy-information.com/moreinfo/history.htm |
| ↑3 | Marvin the village creep volunteered, but nobody trusted their dog to be alone with him. |