Okay, we aren’t doing the work for you. But we are giving you a pleasant bump. Not as in cocaine. Unless you’re writing a book about cocaine. Perhaps a family of W.A.S.P (“pleasant”) take to cocaine to help them through their rigid dinner conversations, most of which painfully circumnavigate the 8 weeks pregnant daughter (another “bump”…). It works. For a while. Until the son, Tommy Fitzgerald, brings a friend to dinner. This friend, unbeknownst to the W.A.S.P family, happens to be the son of the city police chief and may be the baby’s father. A Pleasant Bump is a story of a family finding ways to bond in unlikely places, and of the law that tears them apart.
There’s one idea for you right there. See, that was easy.
What to expect: a low key hour of laughing about ridiculous plot concepts that no sane person should ever try. However, IF a person (sane or otherwise) does use one of the ideas generated during the show, and a finished novel comes of it, then prizes will be given. We aren’t sure what yet, though we do anticipate some amazing.
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Me: Author of 5 books of fiction, creator of funny video content, Twitter following cultivator, YouTube personality, crowd pleaser, book seller, and proponent of the Oxford comma.
You: Publisher looking for an author who knows all about platform building, book selling, and people pleasing. Dollar signs turn you on. Command of the English language turns you on more.
Lovely to meet you, publisher. Up front, I must admit to a bit of a situation. My publisher and I recently separated. Please, don’t assume this split is indicative of our relationship. We had a lovely relationship, actually. Unfortunately, due to matters beyond our control, the publisher has closed its doors completely. As of September 12, 2013 I am officially single.
I know, you’re wondering, “why should I take a chance with you?” It’s a fair question. Allow me a few lines of ego with which to highlight the value I bring to this burgeoning relationship.
[divider3 text=”How important is your career?”]
Very:
2,300+ copies (eBook and print combined) of I Didn’t Mean to be Kevin moved since original publication
40+ stories and non-fiction articles published online and in print (full list)
20+ interviews with and articles about me published online and in print (full list)
Bachelor of Arts, English Literature with a focus on Contemporary American literature and the American short story from Emporia State University. Minor in Creative Writing with a focus on Fiction, postmodernism, and metafiction.
I’m embarrassed by all the kind people in my life. Please, meet some of these kind individuals:
This could be yours. No prenup required.
“Brilliant…one of the most amazing fiction concepts I’ve ever read.”
Rayo Casablanca, author of 6 Sick Hipsters and Very Mercenary re: I Didn’t Mean to be Kevin
“In I Didn’t Mean to Be Kevin, Caleb J. Ross writes fearlessly, never shying away from the wild, insane places where his fertile imagination leads him.”
Joey Goebel, author of Commonwealth and Torture the Artist re: I Didn’t Mean to be Kevin
“A stirring novel, this extraordinary work plays upon the reader’s willingness to suspend disbelief and turns it on its ear… Covering ground similar to the works of Sherman Alexie and Chuck Palahniuk, this is an author worth keeping an eye on.”
Publisher’s Weekly re: I Didn’t Mean to be Kevin
“Here’s hoping some of that mainstream audience can pull their heads out of their asses long enough to read Ross, and then be gloriously horrified.”
Paul Tremblay, author of The Little Sleep and No Sleep Til Wonderland re: I Didn’t Mean to be Kevin
“With As a Machine and Parts Caleb J. Ross continues to stake his claim as his generation’s Watcher.”
Ben Tanzer, author of You Can Make Him Like You and My Father’s House re: As a Machine and Parts
“This is an original—unlike anything you’ve ever read before.”
Rob Roberge, author of More than They Could Chew and The Cost of Living re: Stranger Will
“Just like a Palahniuk novel, Stranger Will reads volatile: it could go any way. Caleb J. Ross leads you with a wry smile into dark places, but by the time you realize it’s too late. You will follow him anywhere.”
Alan Emmins, author of Mop Men: Inside the World of Crime Scene Cleaners re: Stranger Will
“Evoking a novel by Chuck Palahniuk or a film by Darren Aronofsky, Charactered Pieces is a multifarious patchwork of despair. From the misshapen protagonist of the title story to the gruesome climax of “The Camel of Morocco,” this collection is among the most profound and disturbing artifacts of our time.”
Daniel Casebeer, editor of Pear Noir! re: Charactered Pieces
“These stories change you, and not just a little bit. Try to forget them, tell yourself they’re not true, but it’s no use. Whether you want them to or not, they’re going with you.”
Stephen Graham Jones, author of Demon Theory and Ledfeather re: Charactered Pieces
All I ask, publisher, is for just one date to prove myself. If anything, at least it’s a guaranteed free meal, right? Contact me via the Contact Page.
July 22nd, the release of the long awaited The Booked. Anthology, compiled by the minds behind The Booked Podcast. Consider this collection a primer for the names you’ll need to know if you plan on being cool at any dark, alt-literature party. Also, if you know of any dark, alt-lit parties happening let me know. As far as I know they are Sasquatch-level myth.
We’re talking stories from Chris Deal, Christopher J. Dwyer, Michael Paul Gonzalez, Amanda Gowin, Seth Harwood, Gordon Highland, David James Keaton, Nik Korpon, Axel Taiari, Paul Tremblay, Fred Venturini, Craig Wallwork, and many more . And even more amazing, ALL of these stories are NEVER BEFORE SEEN. That’s right. Nothing previously published. You’re getting the new shit this time.
Click over to the The Booked. Anthology page for a full list of contributors along with a variety of purchase options. Or, go straight to Amazon, because let’s face it, that’s where you’re going anyway.
And because you’re reading this from my blog, chances are you’re at least partially interested in my story in the collection, “The Removal Kind.” It’s a story about an illegal transaction gone wrong. And like most of my typical domestic grotesque stories it involves a family and something really, really creepy. Also, it’s probably going to be a chapter in a longer novella or novel sometime, so read it now and be extra hipster cool at those fictitious dark, alt-lit parties.
The Perfect Edge Booksblog tour has officially started! What is it? A tour in which blog posts about 3 Perfect Edge Books releases will be posted on various super-duper blogs over the next few weeks.
I’m telling you, Perfect Edge Books is going places. Big places. I’ve genuinely enjoyed and/or loved every book they’ve published so far in their short few months of existence. If you like my books, or like insightful, rough-around-the-edges, intelligent novels, then definitely check out Perfect Edge Books!
See the tour schedule below. I’ll be updating the dedicated The Perfect Edge Trifecta tour page as new posts are published. Be sure to check back often for updated links.
While you’re at it, head over to the blogs listed below and subscribe, why don’t ya? You’ll like them. They have good stuff to offer.
Perfect Edge Books was founded in late 2011 to unite authors whose books weren’t “obviously” commercial. Our books tend to sit in various genres all at once: literary fiction, satire, neo-noir, sci-fi, experimental prose. We believe that literary doesn’t have to mean difficult, and that difficult doesn’t just mean pointless. We prefer to cultivate a word-of-mouth approach to marketing, and keep production as simple as we can. Learn more at www.PerfectEdgeBooks.com.
NOTE: If the video below shows an error, or looks to be not working, please have patience. I have scheduled this post to go live at 6:00 EST, but the reading may not start exactly on time.
Myself, along with Phil Jourdan, Michael Paul Gonzalez, Ben Loory, Cameron Pierce, and Kirsten Pierce will be reading at the famous International Poster Gallery on March 7th. You should be there. Seriously. I anticipate it will be quite the event. Read all about it at the Facebook Event Page: https://www.facebook.com/events/340073609438138/
Even cooler, you can embed the live stream on your blog or website. In fact, I would love you if you did. Simply paste either of the follow two code options to your website (it’s exactly the same as embedding any other YouTube video). Note that until the event goes live 6:00 EST on March 7th the video will probably give you an error or something. But once I click the broadcast button, the world will rejoice.
I’ll be in Boston from March 6th – 8th for the annual AWP conference. If you’re there, maybe we can meet up. You can buy me a beer.
AWP stands for Association of Writers and Writing Programs. Writers? Writing? Of? is what one would say, if they were intrigued, so let’s pretend that you are. What is this AWP event? It’s an annual gathering of writer types from all over the world for a 3 day event that’s basically a giant literary circle jerk
I’ve attended 6 or 7 so far, sometimes to sign books or perform at a reading, sometimes as part of a panel, but most often as a regular conference-goer. It’s a lot of fun either way.
