Category: As a Machine and Parts

  • A selection of my strangest gifts ever given

    I write domestic grotesque fiction, which is a term I think I made up, but is quite suiting to the themes and content of my stories and books. The most famous short story that I think would fit into the domestic grotesque genre is “Good Country People” by Flannery O’Conner (visualized quite creepily in this short film from the 1960s and quite cheesily in this student clip). Take a family situation—usually some sort of broken family dynamic—mix in something grotesque—possibly morbid but not necessarily—and you’ve probably got domestic grotesque.

    As you can imagine, Christmas is a fun time for my family.

    I’ve given quite a few quirky gifts. Though none could be tagged as grotesque, they are representative of the type of mind that would write a domestic grotesque story, I think. Tis the season and all that, so I figured I would share a few that I’ve so graciously given over the years.

    Kangaroo Scrotum change purse

    Lucky Recipient: uncle

    Yep, it’s a real kangaroo scrotum. I bought one for myself years ago and still use it to this day. Quite durable, those marsupial nut sacks.

    Remote Triggered Farting Bear

    Lucky recipient: sister

    Elegantly simple. Place bear near unsuspecting grandmother. Press remote button. Watch rest of family pretend to ignore what they assume is just a more audible version of what grandma does all the time.

    Huggable Swearing Bear

    Lucky recipient: sister

    Elegantly simple. Place bear near unsuspecting grandmother. Tell grandmother to hug bear. Watch rest of family pretend not to be embarrassed as we hear an audible version of what grandma is thinking all the time.

    Zebra/Tiger Table

    Lucky recipient: mother.

    My mother refused to tell me what she wanted for Christmas, so I taught her a lesson by giving her a bunch of stupid crap. This table is probably the stupidest. Lesson learned, mom. I actually gave a zebra table (sans the tiger), but I couldn’t find a picture of it anywhere online. Though I think I like this one better. 2011 gift idea!

     

    Bath towel with my giant face on it

    Lucky recipient: mother

    I specifically made sure to call this gift a bath towel, rather than a beach towel or dish towel, so as to enhance the creepy factor. That face is actual size…if my face suffered from Elephantiasis. that face is actually about the size of a couch cushion. Bonus funny: I’m my mother’s only son.

     

    Way-too-old child footprints

    Luck recipient: mother

    You remember those cute infant-to-toddler foot print pictures that children often make for their parents. This is kinda like that except instead of ohhh-ing and awwww-ing there was much ewwww-ing and therapist calling. I actually think this was a Mother’s Day gift. Either way, ha!

    Might I recommend you do the same? Creep out your family by gifting one of the items above. Or, better yet, mix in some bookage and give a copy of one of my books. Click below to go to heaven.

  • Preorders are now being accepted for As a Machine and Parts. Preorders will be SIGNED.

    I am so incredibly thrilled to announce that my newest book, As a Machine and Parts, is now available for preorder. Simply click over to the Aqueous Books website to order. ALL PREORDERS WILL BE SIGNED. Unfortunately, they will be signed by me. I tried to reanimate Christopher Reeves or get Stephen Hawking here to do the signing–as that would not only be incredible, but would play nicely into the man/machine hybrid themes of the book–but for some reason I couldn’t get their people to connect with my people. Maybe their people are dead and/or paralyzed, too.

    There are a few amazing deals going on that make preordering even more worth your time and money.

    1. If you preorder As a Machine and Parts (or buy any of my books, actually) you will get a copy of my newest short story collection, Murmurs: Gathered Stories Vol. One for FREE! Click here for details.
    2. Word on the street is that Aqueous Books will be running a Black Friday sale (not what you think, fans of slavery) where any 2 Aqueous Books titles can be had for a measly $20. Check out the Aqueous Books store page for details. My recommendation would be pair As a Machine and Parts with Aaron Polson’s The Saints are Dead. It’s a damn fine read.
    3. You can actually combine the two offers above and still get Murmurs for free.

    If you don’t order the book, you are basically calling these people liars:

    There was once a Marvel comic book called “What if…” and in it Uatu the Watcher, a bald sage-like character with an enormous head spun speculative tales of alternative versions of the Marvel Universe you thought you knew. With As a Machine & Parts Caleb J. Ross continues to stake his claim as his generation’s Watcher, which should not be construed as a commentary on his beautiful, yet clearly fake head of hair, but instead as an observation about the scope of his imagination and his ongoing vision of what the world can be, might be and just maybe will be if Ross has anything to say about it.

    Ben Tanzer, author of Most Likely You Go Your Way and I’ll Go Mine

    As a Machine and Parts is equal parts hilarious, absurd and touching. It’s the kind of book that after reading makes you say, ‘Damn, why didn’t I think of that first?’ only to realize you couldn’t have done it so well. Wildly inventive without collapsing under the weight of its own genius, As a Machine and Parts proves that Caleb J. Ross is one of the most exciting young authors writing today.

    Nik Korpon, author of Stay God and Old Ghosts

  • Source of story ideas: Infographics

    Source of story ideas: Infographics

    A question many writers get is “where do you get your ideas?” This question often originates from one of two sources: 1) a desire for a new writer to find that secret arterial idea spring, or 2) a reassurance that the author isn’t insane (I assure you that the idea to embed fingernails into The Bible was not based on an actual event in my life).

    The truth is they come from everywhere. A mis-heard conversation, a sudden obsession with a particular song or painting, a dare; these things and more have been sources of my own stories for years. One of the recent areas where I’ve been seeing a lot of potential is infographics.

    For those not aware, infographics are basically graphical ways to show data. Data can be boring. Colors and drawings are fun. Therefore, the infographic.

    Below (way below, at the bottom of this post) I’ve included one such infographic that I think has some potential. I’ve isolated three of the data points following, and included a few initial thoughts on the possibilities each hold.

    That’s incredible. Imagine a what the science of such projection would look like in the hands of a madman. Or, imagine a climatic (though probably funny) scene in which a man stabs a guy and gets hit in the eye with blood.
    So, The Matrix was full of shit, then? Still, knowing how little amount of power the brain actually takes to function could make for some interesting machine/man hybrid stories.
    Stomach acid harvested for use in either torture or construction. What about when someone is murdered by way of a knife to the stomach? Has acid ever leaked out, leaving a permanent scare on the hand of the killer? Perhaps in your story it has.

    (more…)

  • A rest from the road to read at Orange Alert Podcast, episode 70

    A rest from the road to read at Orange Alert Podcast, episode 70


    Literature lover and good natured promoter of all things indy, Jason Behrends offers up his newest episode of the Orange Alert Podcast with lovely side dish of yours truly. He has included my reading of the first chapter of As a Machine and Parts (from a March reading at Method in Kansas City) in this newest episode. Jason was one of the earliest supporters of As a Machine and Parts, so it means a lot to have him include me.

    Listen to the full episode here.

  • Stranger Will tour stop #44: Pela Via’s blog

    What follows is a conversation between myself and writer and Warmed and Bound editor, Pela Via. Why? We like chatting about ourselves. Or, read a much prettier version at Pela’s blog.

    Pela Via: Thanks for talking to me again, Caleb. You are one of the hardest workers in contemporary fiction; I always love a chance to corner you into a long, stifling conversation. Are you as prolific as you seem?

    Caleb J. Ross: Prolific is a term that seems appropriate at first, but really a better way to say it would be “got lucky all at once.” Stranger Will and I Didn’t Mean to be Kevin, the two 2011 novels, were both written a few years ago, each a year or so apart. And the novella also to be released this year, As a Machine and Parts, was written even later than the novels. This is all to say that I spent about eight years writing the books, but the one year release schedule implies otherwise. I’m actually quite the disappointment.

    PV: Hardly. Your short work is everywhere. Do you plan to release any books in 2012?

    CJR: As for 2012, nothing is contracted yet. But I have plenty to write.

    PV: What do these two novels represent in your writing career?

    CJR: The books both deal with parenthood, but from opposite angles. Stranger Will is about a parent not wanting his child. IDMtbK is about a child wanting nothing more than to have a parent. IDMtbK was written later, and I see it as a reaction to Stranger Will; it is both a personal goal (as in “now, let me see if I can to the opposite of what I just did”) and a reader-based goal (as in “I had better show readers that I’m not as crazy as Stranger Will would imply”).

    PV: Do you feel more official this year, as a writer? I know it’s not your first book, but Stranger Will is your first published novel. Has it helped your ego?

    CJR: The ego has taken a bit of a stroke, for sure. What makes me feel the most validated with Stranger Will is that I have a lot of strangers commenting on the book. With Charactered Pieces, my first book, I would say about 70% of the readers knew me personally. With Stranger Will that number seems significantly different.

    PV: I’m frightened of reaching that place where my work is just barely popular enough to be reviewed by non-friends (and consequently panned).

    CJR: I wouldn’t worry about having strangers review your work. I’ve found that the panning is about the same with strangers and friends. The difference being that friends tend to critique you as a person along with the work (“Wow, I can’t imagine you writing something like this”) whereas strangers tend to focus on the work itself.

    PV: Interesting. So does it sting a bit more, then, when it comes from friends, if they have a complaint? Does it feel like they’re speaking to your general ability as a human and writer?

    CJR: Most of my friends who read early drafts are writers themselves, so I understand that all intentions are good. That said, it can still sting. But the sting is more because of my passion for the work rather than my relationship to the reader.
    (more…)

  • @BenTanzer says “With As a Machine & Parts Caleb J. Ross continues to stake his claim as his generation’s Watcher”

    @BenTanzer says “With As a Machine & Parts Caleb J. Ross continues to stake his claim as his generation’s Watcher”

    Apparently there are a couple of Advance Reader Copies of my forthcoming book, As a Machine and Parts floating around out there, giving bad names to bookshelves across the country. One landed in Ben Tanzer’s filthy mitts (creepy refection in the image above is actually Nik Korpon, however). Having the man behind You Can Make Him Like You and My Father’s House say such nice things about my book makes me all crazy inside. His words, as he might say, have changed my life (that is a comment on the title of his own blog, This Blog Will Change Your Life, not a comment on Ben Tanzer’s ego).

    His words, not mine:

    “There was once a Marvel comic book called “What if…” and in it Uatu the Watcher, a bald sage-like character with an enormous head spun speculative tales of alternative versions of the Marvel Universe you thought you knew. With As a Machine & Parts Caleb J. Ross continues to stake his claim as his generation’s Watcher, which should not be construed as a commentary on his beautiful, yet clearly fake head of hair, but instead as an observation about the scope of his imagination and his ongoing vision of what the world can be, might be and just may will be if Ross has anything to say about it”

  • Coming in the future: As a Machine and Parts, a novella that will blow your robot brain

    Coming in the future: As a Machine and Parts, a novella that will blow your robot brain

    In the next few years I’m going to be pushing more paper on you than the schoolyard drug dealer’s less popular friend, the Zig Zag dealer. My novella, As a Machine and Parts, will be published by Aqueous Books sometime in the future. Yes, I could qualify any of my unpublished books with such a loose time frame. But I mean it. The contract has been signed. The Zig Zags have been distributed.

    The party probably won’t happen until 2012 or later, however. That should give you plenty of time to read my other two forthcoming books, vomit a few times, and forget them long enough to make that mistake a third time.